Tuesday, April 01, 2008
NCCCCC: Dopiest Comics Dad
In the second round of the National Corniest Cliché Comic Character Countdown we are looking at the heads of households that are clueless dorks. The cliché comic dad is a clueless loser easily duped by his wife and kids. These guys could have a CBS sitcom based on them. The trick is finding the fine line between satire and stupidity. Homer Simpson is a parody of the typical sitcom dad, but Jim NoLastName from According to Jim is just a tool.
The trick is interpreting intent and execution. Dads that I cut from the short list included Walter Duncan of Zits, Greg Wilkins of Curtis, and My Hero Ted Forth because they all exhibit signs of life underneath the heavy lidded burden of paternity.
And I have to invoke the No Pattersons Rule. They are so polarizing that they would win regardless of category. I've also declared Roger Fox from Foxtrot ineligible since the Sunday-only version barely features him.
Dagwood Bumstead (Blondie)
Dagwood is one of the archetypal comic characters. He is lazy, clueless, and always hungry, but he just doesn’t seem to spend a lot of time being a dad. Mostly he hands money to Chip and answers the phone for his 50’s era teenagers.
Hiram Flagstone (Hi And Lois)
There is no more clueless family than the Flagstones. Hiram (Hi for punnish reasons) is the traditional whiter-than-Wonder breadwinner that comes home to a house of chaos. And like Kevin James in King of Queens, he has a wife way hotter than he deserves.
Ralph Drabble (Drabble)
Deliberately clueless, the Drabble family pater familias is just Homer Simpson just without the lovable doofusness. We laugh at him rather than with him. That is if we laugh at all.
Frank DeGroot (Luann)
Luann’s dad is full of advice. Lots and lots of bad clueless advice. He has a son that has conned him into his own house. His titular daughter is one of the shallowest ditziest teenagers this side of a Zoey 101 marathon. And his shiny forehead just screams impending mid-life crisis.
Darryl MacPherson (Baby Blues)
While he may not be a household name, nobody exhibits the signs of domestic emasculation worse than the dad of Baby Blues. He is constantly changing diapers, wiping noses, or shopping for mini-vans. He is either too sad or too real.
So pick the dad you love to hate or just despise for being such a weenie.
Write-ins and comments welcome.