Sunday, October 15, 2006

Hilary and Faye: Friends Forever

Don't ask me how, but the other day I ran across a Xanga page that sounded familiar. Sure enough, it was the page of Hilary Forth, who is the only daughter of my hero, Ted Forth. I had to clean up some of the ugly Xanga HTML, but here are some of the highlights from the past year or so.

Date: August 30, 2005
Mood: Bummed Out
Listening to: Wake Me When September Ends (Kidz Bop 9)

School really sucks. It seems like every year is the same as the last one over and over again. This year, though, I finally entered middle-school. That’s when the trouble started. All the older kids said I looked like Cindy Brady, and I don’t even know who she is. My mom who is really cool, but kinda sarcastic tried to make me feel better, but my parents are both sort of dorks, so it didn’t help much. I tried to wear my hair different but it just looked stupid.

Date: September 10, 2005
Mood: Confused
Listening to: 1985 (Kidz Bop 7)

Mom is some sort of big business woman and she just got a promotion, but now she has to work with her old boss who she really hates, so that sucks. My dad hates his job and gets mad when I say I don’t even know what he does. He tries to explain it, but it seems he spends most of the time just avoiding the jerks he works with. My point is that they’re grown-ups and have no clue what I’m going through, even though my dad tries to act all cool and everything. He acts like a big hero, but I don’t think the neighbors like him very much.

Date: February 2, 2006
Mood: Blah
Listening to: Miss Independent (Kidz Bop 4)

My mom talked me into taking some lame afterschool class after she saw this picture I drew. She acted all impressed, but she couldn't even tell what it was. I knew it was just her trying to get me out of my mood. But then I met Faye. Faye is an artist too and she dresses punk or goth or something. You know, all that crap you can buy at Hot Topic but your parents don’t let you. I don't think Mom likes her very much. She keeps telling Faye to "lose the 'tude."

Date: Febuary 9, 2006
Mood: Experimental
Listening to: Seasons of Love (Rent Soundtrack)

I’m glad I finally found a friend that likes me as I am even if her hair is all spikey like that guy in class that is always listening to “Rent” all the time. Faye tried to get me to cut my hair, but then changed her mind, saying she likes me better “femme”, whatever that means. I don’t think it has anything to do with feminine hygiene like we got told about in Family Life class. I don’t even have my period yet, so I don’t get it.

Date: March 3, 2006
Mood: Thinking
Listening to: Nobody's Home (Kidz Bop 8)

Faye’s mom is never home so after school she hangs out with me at the neighbor’s house until mom and dad get home. Mom and dad carpool together. It’s my mom’s stupid idea on how to save money for their fancy-schmancy trip that got ruined when Kitty got sick. Then the refrigerator broke and that blew the budget again. I don’t think they’re ever going to get to Paris.

Date: March 27, 2006
Mood: Hungry
Listening to: The Anthem (Kidz Bop 4)

Faye wants to start a band, but the only instrument we own is the clarinet. Why couldn’t my dad have played something cool when he was in high school like the saxophone? So Faye eats over at our house a lot since her mom just gives her candybars. Faye says we’re just like the Cleavers, but I don’t know who they are. I wish mom would let us get basic cable back. I hate her and her “budget.”

Date: March 30, 2006
Mood: Annoyed
Listening to: Boys Don't Cry (The Cure - my dad's)

Fay and I named our new band New Delhi Monkey Gang. At dinner my dad was trying to act like he knew all about music and stuff and asked Faye who her “influences” were and she said Sleater Kinney and LeTigre. My dad had never heard of either of them. He thinks good music ended with The Cure. Not that they’re bad but how about something from this century?

Date: April 1, 2006
Mood: Annoyed
Listening to: Toxic (Kidz Bop 6)

I just wish my parents would like her a little more. Mom puts her purse on top of our new refrigerator whenever Faye is around. And when Faye wants to spend the night, my parents change the subject until it’s too late to call her mom and they have to drive her home.

Date: April 22, 2006
Mood: Sporty
Listening to: Let's Get Started (Kidz Bop 7)

I liked hanging around with Faye but softball season is starting and my parents coach the team. Our team really sucks. Last year we didn’t win any games and the other parents acted like jerks, but none of them would volunteer, so we’re stuck with my folks. I thought Faye would quit being friends with me, but my mom somehow talked her into joining the team. Faye says sports are kinda cool after all.

Date: April 25, 2006
Mood: Morbid
Listening to: Girl Next Door (Kidz Bop 10)

Faye thought it was really cool when Ole Man Gezelter died and they called an ambulance and everything. Mom wouldn’t let me see the corpse, but Faye still thought it was cool. She said she saw an ambulance once when her older brother OD’d, but they just sent him to some tough-love camp. She doesn't talk much about her family. She says its just one big Springer episode.

Date: June 6, 2006
Mood: Relaxed
Listening to: Accidentally In Love (Kidz Bop 7)

This weekend Fay and I just hung out and watched movies. She says my dad’s gladiator movies are so gay, but the guys just fight each other, so how can that be gay? My Blockbuster card is youth restricted so I can’t get the R-rated movies like Basic Instinct and Bound, so we rented Fried Green Tomatos and A League of Their Own.

Date: July 12, 2006
Mood: Creative
Listening to: Rush (Aly & AJ, Into The Rush)

I don't think our band is very good. I think we should go sound like Aly and AJ or Rebeccah, but Faye wants to just play new songs loud and heavy. She says that The Go-Gos couldn't play their instruments at first either, but now Gina Schock is a great drummer.

Date: August 31, 2006
Mood: Angry
Listening to: What's Left Of Me (Kidz Bop 10)

Faye got mad at me when we lost softball game. She says I threw a bad pitch. I say she missed the catch. We both say my dad screams like a little girl. She tries to hang around the other girls on the team, but they call her “Butch”. My dad watches that movie all the time and says that Robert Redford is dreamy.

Date: September 9, 2006
Mood: Moody
Listening to: Bad Day (Kidz Bop 10)

It’s the first day of school again. I hate the fifth grade. It’s like all the stuff I learned last year all over again. My mom keeps bugging me to see if I’m okay. She’s not happy unless she is right and I’m miserable. She sent Dad up to my room to talk to me. He kinda missed Faye too. At least to help open pickle jars.

Date: October 3, 2006
Mood: Friends again.
Listening to: Cool (Kidz Bop 9)

I said "hey" to Faye at school yesterday, but I thought she just ignored me. I was just bouncing a basketball against the garage door and Faye came over. She's going to show me how to make a basketball slingshot. Maybe I can get her to join the basketball team too. Faye’s favorite player is Sheryl Swoopes. The gym teacher says she’ll let us stay after class and practice until tryouts and even give us private lessons. That would be really cool.

Me again. Reading over a year of Hilary's thoughts makes me realize that kids have their own way of showing friendship. They meet, hang out, start bands, join teams, have fights, and get back together. A good friendship goes unspoken. Good friends don't need apologies, they just pickup up they left off. I think Hilary and Faye will be best friends forever. Or at least as long as the youngest Forth is in the fifth grade.


Anonymous said...


This, combined with (1)Achenbach's advice to Wilbrod to "recycle" previous writing for her blog AND (2) Babes in Boyland, where Gina Barreca uses verbatim quotes from her college-era journal to supplement her present-day memories, makes me wonder how many people are excerpting their old journals for their blogs. How about you, yj? You have old notebooks lying around? I kept journals all through high school, but my self-loathing was such that at some point during my college years I threw them all away.

Anonymous said...

Very clever. You've captured the essence of fifth grade angst ala Forth very well.

J.Po said...

Nice work, yello - though I'm guessing that Ted probably listens to SOME new music, perhaps Clay Aiken or the new Elton John CD.

Anonymous said...

Loved it, very funny.