Wednesday, July 18, 2007

New Delhi Monkey Gang Auditions

It’s the lazy days of summer and Best Friends Forever Hilary and Faye are reforming their band, The New Delhi Monkey Gang. They have been contemplating changing the name of the band several times to something that is a little more television friendly in hopes of getting a deal with a major kid’s network. As Entertainment Weekly details, a show on Disney Channel or Nickelodeon is a major career opportunity. It’s more than a TV show, it’s albums, concerts and movies. Just ask The Cheetah Girls or The Naked Brothers Band (yeah, that’s a real show, hopefully not as pervy as the title would make you think).

For these Sally Forth characters to make the transition to the small screen, proper casting is vital. Here are some tween stars that might make the grade. It is going to take a precocious actress to fit the role of a perpetual fifth grader trying to make it in the musical world.

Miley Cyrus
Hannah Montana
Current Age: 14

Miley just missed the cut for the Teenage Girl President casting call. In Hannah Montana she plays a pop superstar that goes to middle school incognito. She clearly has the musical chops to be a Dehli Monkey, but she might not want to get typecast in this type of show. Miley is clearly destined for bigger things, like a CW sitcom.

Role: Hilary most likely. Gotta get more mileage out of that blonde Hannah wig.

Miranda Cosgrove
iCarly, Drake and Josh
Current Age: 14

Miranda has a huge stage presence, but her musical talent is unproven. Her School of Rock role was as business manager, but some lessons should get her in the groove right away.

Role: Faye all the way. She has withering sarcasm down cold.

Jordan Todosey
Life With Derek
Current Age:12

Jordan has been playing a supporting role as Ashley Leggat’s baby sister Lizzie on Derek, but she is ready to move onto the big time. Going from a sidekick or sibling role to a starring vehicle is a traditional tweener show career path.

Role: With enough peroxide, Hilary.

Selena Gomez
Wizards of Waverly Place
Current Age: 14

Since starting out as a moppet on Barney, Selena has been working her way around the dial in bit parts and guest star roles. Now she could hit the big time.

Role: Could be either, but the ethnic angle would make her lean towards Faye.

Susan Olsen
The Brady Bunch
Current Age: 45

When it comes to pigtails, no one rocks them like the former Cindy Brady. Unfortunately, it would take a major time machine to get her back in her youthful prime.

Role: Hilary, natch. There really is no other choice.

Hey Kids: This post is a joke. There is no real New Delhi Monkey Gang show holding auditions. Yet. And you can quit leaving your real name and e-mail address in the comments of my TGP Casting Call post. Didn’t your parents teach you about stranger danger and giving away personal information on the internet?

Everyone Else: Who would you cast as a character in a Sally Forth sitcom?

Update: In the comments, mooselet suggested Selena Gomez as Hilary. She would have to go blonde, but she can work the ponytails. I can definitely see it.


Anonymous said...

As a popular blogger (ha ha oxymoron), I've had a lot of odd and unsettling Internet experiences, but I have to say that having dozens of teenage girls eagerly posting their contact information in my comments hoping that I'll make them a star is not one of them. For which I am very, very thankful.

Mooselet said...

Holy dooley, those girls over on your other post are... well the term brain dead comes to mind. And moronic. And soon to be found on a milk carton. Didn't their parents teach them how to read, as I'm pretty sure no where on your blog does it state you're a TV producer.

I'm very afraid now for the future.

Anyway, as to your current 'casting couch call'... if you dyed Selana's hair blonde she could be Hilary with those cheeks, and Miranda as Faye.

Stella Dean said...

Teenage girls should be locked in a cave until they're 33. IMHO

yellojkt said...

I've been getting those "pick me" comments about once a week and lately the pace has been picking up. It's very creepy because I would e-mail them to clue them in, but I don't know which of them is Chris Hansen.

Jeff and Charli Lee said...

Good call Yello - Chris Hansen is one of those people you do NOT want to have to meet in person.

Unknown said...

You might want to just remove the posts altogether, lest Chris Hansen declare that you're running some kind of entrapment ring.

Elizabeth said...

I just read all those comments! Holy Moly that's scary!! I agree with the "locked in a cave until their 33" idea!

Anonymous said...

Josh is right. You really ought to just delete those comments. Even if you wouldn't do anything with them, they are still there for just anybody to see. Best to be proactive.

2fs said...

By the way, if you're an attractive young woman who's *older* than age 18, I'm a super-duper califragilistically influential casting director - so send those e-mails, phone numbers, and publicity photos to me.

(I am too joking.)

Unknown said...

hey i heard jordan is rlly a guy but got transplant or watever that crap is but thats not true right???

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I would say that Miley Cirus is the perfect for it. she is not just an excellent actress, but she has so much experience and besides, she sings like her dad: amazingly.

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