Tuesday, October 04, 2005

Supreme Court Options

President Bush’s nomination of Harriet Miers to replace Sandra Day O’Connor on the Supreme Court is proving controversial. One problem is the perceived lack of legal experience on the part of Harriet Miers. George Will contends that she would not make the the top 100 list of any of the top 100 constitutional thinkers. Charles Krauthammer wonders what distinguishes her from the other one million lawyers in the country, other than that she knows W. As a public service, I have compiled a list of prestigious female lawyers that are more qualified to sit on the Supreme Court.

Ellenor Frutt
(Camryn Manheim)
Advantages: Kick-ass lawyer for seven seasons. Knows how to get her way.
Disadvantages: Liberal stance on in-vitro fertilization hurts support among pro-lifers.
Amy Brenneman
(Amy Gray)
Advantages: Actual judicial experience.
Disadvantages: Has to check with Tyne Daly on all her decisions.
Grace Van Owen
(Susan Dey)
Advantages: Would be hottest Supreme Court Justice ever.
Disadvantages: Partridge Family fan lawyers seeking autographs would be very distracting during oral arguments.

OK, those are fictional characters. But if we think outside the box, we can come up with some real-life candidates that haven’t made anybody elses short list.

Katherine Harris
Advantages: Proven Bush loyalty.
Disadvantages: Not real good at counting.
“Judge Judy” Sheindin
Advantages: Actual judicial experience.
Disadvantages: Unlikely to take paycut.
Hillary Clinton
Advantages: Graduated from a more prestigious law school. Would take her out of running for 2008 Presidential race.
Disadvantages: Unlikely to overturn Roe v. Wade until Chelsea hits menopause.

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Kim said...

lmao!!! Oh that's good! I don't even know which one I'd vote for if I had the chance. Hmmmm .... Okay, I'd vote for Grace, and that's because Grace is my middle name.

Michele sent me today!

Anonymous said...

Wait a minute, "hottest supreme court justice ever?" I think you're forgetting a little someone named ... John Paul Stevens!

Click here for hotness



J.Po said...

Great one, yello!

Call me a cynic, but it appears the Rove Truthbending Machine is operating at full steam here:

1. Find a Bush crony with absolutely no paper trail. Make sure it's NOT a white male so anyone who pries into background will be perceived as a racist, sexist, un-American.

2. Line up a few conservatives who, for value received, will publicly state that she isn't Cro-Magnon enough.

3. Wait for the rest of us to say, "wow, she must be a great nominee. Rubber stamp, please?"

I would like to throw my support (or something) behind Susan Dey. Hottest. Justice. Ever.

Unknown said...

I'm gonna get behind Amy Brenneman. She has good hair.

And I've heard the music to Wicked and from what I can tell, you're right. It is a serious abridgement of the book. There is no Glinda/Elphaba/Fiyero love triangle in the book. Glinda marries some old society man right out of Shiz. But the music and story still sound amazing.

Bonvallet said...

Bush hired his own personal lawyer? How odd.

I'm for Amy too. I've seen the show, it's good she turns to Tyne for every decision. Tyne is an amazing mom.

Anonymous said...

Halarious! And, so true. I needed the laugh right now :)

Your Mother said...

OMG that was a great list! I'd vote for Susan Dey because she is hot.

Pirate Princess said...

Thanks for visiting the other day.

Interesting candidates.

trusty getto said...

Camryn's totally got my vote ;)

Interestingly I don't think the nominee lacks legal experience, in fact, she's got a boatload of legal experience. She's just never been a judge, which I think says a lot about what Bush wants us to know about his nominee.

Anonymous said...

This made me laugh out loud! Thanks for the giggle. I tagged you, btw.

Anonymous said...

Grace Van Owen. And yes, indeed, becky, she was a judge toward the end of LA Law. So that's another point in her favor.

I could get behind that other judge on Divorce Court, too. DC had a great ad running in NYC subways for awhile: "Watch it with someone you loved."

carmilevy said...

I need to wait for the happy tears to clear out of my eyes before I can choose my favorite. Great, great entry!

Visiting from Michele's again. I'll just keep digging deeper into your archives...sort of like a treasure hunt.

Anonymous said...

i dasagree with all of u, i am the greatest!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and my m8 bob said,and i quote, 'up urs'! to all of u! love y'all xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx